3 days and 3 followers...

I made it up to 3 followers...gosh I'm popular! I found out today that TCU is not only paying me to go to Brussels, but that they are also giving me $900 extra dollars to spend on whatever....probably beer, chocolate, and waffles. Suck it TCU...that's for giving me up to the law firm who was suing me for illegally distributing music. I'll spend your money on crap. But that's another story and not what this blog is about.

But since there aren't any good stories yet, I'll give you a 2 in one story just for reading so far. These stories are the kind you want to hear when you're having a bad day so you can think back and go "thank god that isn't my life". You're welcome.

Background of story one: Summer of 2009. I am nannying too many kids and I have to drop 2 of the kids off at Museum School. There is a major hottie that works at this school. I see him 4 times a day, at least. Unfortunately, he might be in high school, but let me tell you his outer beauty was spectacular. I never spoke with him, but this story is about the day I did.

Story 1: I just dropped both kids off at their classrooms and I have to walk back by hottie. I decided that today I am going to walk by, make eye contact, say something short and sweet, but leave a little mystery in there. Cosmo tells me that that is the best way to hook a guy! Cosmo is wrong because I walk by, make eye contact and to my surprise he said "Hey". I'm not sure if I was thrown off because I didn't get to finish my routine, but instead of saying "hi" back, I end up tripping a little kid and knocking him down at least 5 stairs. IN THE RAIN! I literally stand there and watch this kid fall down a flight of stairs and then start to cry. What do I do you ask?!?! Do I help this little kid up, do I apologize profusely to the kid and family, do I try and do anything?!! NO....I say "I gotta go" and I run away! Gosh, that was so stupid. Was that mysterious enough Cosmo....? So, when I went to pick the kids up I was hoping that I was able to see the hottie again and regain any dignity that I lost, but to my luck I never saw him again! Yea, he was definitely hooked.

Background to story 2: Summer 2009. I am nannying this little boy, Nicholas. He enjoys playing sports outside. For all those who know me, know that I am not athletic in any way! Nicholas wants to practice his soccer and baseball outside one day.

Story 2: Nicholas and I are out in his backyard playing tag or something. He wants to practice soccer, so he grabs his ball and we are kicking it around. I'm doing fairly well, making some good shots...nbd (no big deal). Nicholas says and I quote "Sarah, kick it as hard as you can". Me, wanting to please this little kid....that sounded dirty and it wasn't meant to be...says "alright, let's see what I can do"....he throws the ball to me, I line it up right and I kick this ball really hard. I thought it was a great kick until I see Nicholas on the ground holding his face. Oh crap. I kicked this little boy in the face with his own soccer ball! I start freaking out, but secretly laughing because what are the odds that I would do that!! He stands up and brushes himself off, says that he is alright, yet he has a bright red spot on his face...oops. Nicholas decides that we are going to switch sports and move to baseball. We are throwing the ball, hitting it, everything is fine. Nicholas says and I quote "Sarah, hit it as hard as you can". Me, knowing that there is no way in hell that I'm going to hit this ball, agree. He throws it, to my surprise I hit the ball, I start jumping and screaming because I'm so excited (those who have had the pleasure of seeing me excited know how I can get), then I see Nicholas on the ground. What the hell! How is it that I can hit this little boy in the face TWICE with two different sporting objects and I can't play a decent game of anything?! So, the baseball hits him straight in the head. He isn't happy about this, he starts throwing his baseball bat at me and all the balls that he can find and chasing me around the yard. I have a crazy 6 year old on my ass now! He starts screaming that I did that on purpose and runs inside and tells his mom that I hit him on purpose and that I was trying to kill him! Keep in mind that this is the 2nd time I have ever babysat for him. I was mortified. How do you recover from hitting this little kid in the face twice and then defend yourself when he is saying that I am trying to kill him?! I really was just shit out of luck. The mom decided that I was done for the day. Nicholas held a grudge for a while...such a girl. But he did give me 4 cents to add to my Brussels fund. He was probably saving up for a while.

Now, which situation would you rather find yourself in?! haha ya, neither! Welcome to my life!